I’ve been in search of non-eggy low carb breakfast foods because I am trying to be healthy but I hate, truly hate, eggs. When well-meaning internet sources suggest what they claim will be “non-eggy!!!11” breakfast foods, they need to just shut their evil faces, because those dang low carb pancakes ALWAYS taste like eggs.


But these! Ham and cheese “Hot Pockets.”

 They’re glorious! I searched Pinterest for a few days and combined recipes and techniques from several sources to come up with a recipe that works for me. I’ve made several batches now, and keep them in the fridge so The Mister and I can quickly grab and reheat for 60 seconds on our way to work. They taste remarkably like “real” Hot Pockets, and one batch makes 6, or I double it to make 10. They last perfectly in the fridge and I finally have a breakfast food that I can make ahead so that I don’t feel like reaching for a bad food option as I rush out the door in the mornings.

Best of all, they don’t taste a bit like eggs, even to my hyper-vigilant egg-hating self.

 

In a glass bowl, microwave for 2 minutes:

8 ounces cream cheese

1 ½ c. shredded mozzarella

½ c. shredded cheddar

 

In a separate bowl, mix together:

1.5 c. almond flour

1 TBS coconut flour

1 tsp baking powder

½ tsp each: salt, cracked pepper and xantham gum

Dash freshly ground nutmeg (optional) 

Add dry ingredients to melted cheeses, stir thoroughly; add 1 egg and mix thoroughly (I “knead” it with my hands for a few moments).

Divide dough half, and each of those halves into 6 equal pieces (12 total pieces). Roll pieces into balls, then put between two pieces of parchment paper and roll out to be very thin, but not translucent. Transfer 6 pieces to a lined baking sheet—these will be the bottom of the Hot Pockets; roll out the other 6 pieces to be the tops.

 

Place filling onto bottom pieces; I used 3 c. chopped ham (cold on my first batch; in subsequent batches I have cooked the ham down to reduce moisture and it is MUCH better), 3 TBS roasted hatch chiles, divided between the 6 pockets, and then a slice of cheese for each. You could use any fillings you want.

Place the top pieces of dough, and crimp sides and edges so that there are no gaps.

 

Bake at 400 for 23 minutes (may be different based on elevation) or until golden brown. To store, wait until they are completely cooled so there is no condensation, then I store in individual plastic bags so I can always open the fridge, grab, and reheat.

 Best made with a little kitchen helper! 

 

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